The Wacky Side of Golf |
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19TH HOLE COMEDY • Today, the blog • Tomorrow, the book |
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It's All a Dream This entry was posted on 5/27/2006 12:53 PM and is filed under uncategorized. Golf equipment and personal grooming products have a great deal in common. Golf clubs, lipstick, golf balls, eye liner, mascara, male pattern baldness remedies, putters, tooth whiteners, wrinkle removers, wedges, even boob jobs -- are all marketed alike. The manufacturers sell dreams, not products. Just dreams. Nothing more. They try to hoodwink us into believing their new golf clubs will help us win a club championship or their new eye liner will get us “Mr. Right.” It’s merely an illusion. If you butcher golf courses with the crummy clubs in the back of your Chevy pickup, you’ll gum-up just as many shots with the clubs in the slick full color ad. If you are as bald as a boulder and apply the heavily-advertised miracle hair restorer with a spatula you have as much chance of growing curls as soy beans. If you are uglier than a prune, and guys in a singles bar ignore you at two in the morning after downing a pail of vodka you will still be dateless if you apply the new, sexy eyeliner with a roller. You can prance through a men’s prison batting your eyes, wiggling your ass, and waving a fistful of pardons. You will fly solo. I look at it this way: Buying golf clubs is like buying deodorant. If you're lucky, each purchase make your game stink a little bit less. CommentsDisplay comments as (Linear | Threaded)
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